Yesterday, on Christmas Eve, I spent the morning making a wooden Christmas tree (…yes I know you can buy them in the shops). It made me think of the difference between a real handyman and me (a sheep in wolf’s overalls).
If we could read minds:
FIRST HOUR
Genuine handyman: “Boy this is fun”
Mike: “Boy this is fun”
SECOND HOUR
Genuine handyman: “Boy this is fun”
Mike: “Boy this is a bit more complicated than I thought. Concentrate now, if I cut off a finger with this angle grinder Heidi’s not going to be happy taking me to ER with Christmas lunch still to be prepared”

THIRD HOUR
Genuine handyman: “Boy this is fun”
Mike: “Who’s dang fool idea was this!! …Why did I promise to make one where the parts actually swivel around a central rod…They were selling these things on the side of the road!!… That’s the last time I say ‘for you I killa da bull!’ when my wife mentions something like this….”
FOURTH HOUR
Genuine handyman: “This beer tastes good. That’s a mighty fine looking tree, even if I say so myself. Maybe I should make another one for my brother”
Mike: “Okay, nearly finished. If only I had the right sized drill bit. This thing better last because I’m not doing this again…”

