Author: mike

Now i’m waiting for the illuminati to locate me through the microchip; but I’m ready for them.  I stocked up on a 6-month supply of doom spray. I’m not trying

I can’t help admiring the average cat’s strong sense of self-entitlement.  Those who struggle excessively with self-effacement watch and take notes.

A few weeks ago I had to remove two old rusted garage door springs and mechanisms.  My wife definitely said, “Be careful, those things are powerful.” I didn’t see any

Several factors conspired to cause my miraculous conversion from floral cynic to fan.  Besides reminding myself of the divorce-destroying adage that has served our marriage so well (“if it’s important

The other day I came in soaked and cold off my bike, to pour the water out of my boots and jump into a hot bath…only to find unexpected guests

…any excuse will do to keep my wife amused and distracted from the fact that I’m several weeks behind on some of the tasks I agreed to on our to-do-list. 

This is a plant at my office ; it’s pretty much dead.  I tried to revive it with water, singing, cooing, and recitations of William Wordsworth, but the ghost is

Four days ago a horrendous amount of water started to seep mysteriously from the base of our kitchen and bathroom walls.  Between deciding whether or not to pay R6000 for